Looking for new writers and graphic designers!
Come to our meetings every Sunday night at 8:30pm 5th floor of Lerner (near the student
government office).
All are welcome.
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About Us
We have a long and storied history. Learn more about us...
In This Issue
- Celebrate Our Appendix!
- Alternative Motherhood
- Gossip and Nudity: Interview with the Gossip
- Letters to the Feditors
- The Colombia Spectador
- Yowie! How the Brazilians do bikini wax
- Making Waves
- Am I Naked or Nude?
- Marauding Interviewer: Dwarves Fascinated by Own Pants
- Big Nudity Exam
- Point – Counterpoint
- ‘Is It Cold In Here?’
- News Briefs
- News Quiz: Do you know about the important events going on in your world?
- Eight Situations In Which I Am Naked
- Get Your Hands Off Me You Damn, Dirty Apes
- Naked Haikus
- Naked Horoscopes
- This is Not a Naked Santa
- THEY Watch
- The Staff of 16.8
‘Is It Cold In Here?’
Meghan Keane
Did you ever wish you had a sexier job? Being a janitor just isn't enough for you anymore? According to Jerry Springer "Too Hot for TV" guests, the simple path to a sexier job lies not in what you wear, but, you guessed it, in what you're not wearing. Although it's legal for women to go without a shirt in New York state now, some New Yorkers feel that being topless is just not good enough. We here at the Fed Health Board have compiled a list with the Surgeon General to warn you that some of the following jobs are not the best opportunity for sexing up the situation:
Naked Jehovah’s Witness
“Have you found God? Or my underwear?”
Naked germ warfare developer
“Achhk… dying”
Naked Senior Citizen
(this is for our personal protection)
Naked prisoner of war
“Tuhn gah det rinje!” tr. Give me some pants!
Naked Eskimo
“Is it cold in here?”
Naked bee-keeper
“Oh, that smarts.”
Naked Priest
“Father, have you sinned?”
Naked Religious Right Activist
“Stop pornography now. And stop looking at my breasts.”
Naked Lobsterman
“Get yer stinkin’ hand outa me traps.”
Naked nursery school teacher
“No Bobby. You cannot use me for show and tell.”
Naked Policeman
“Did you see where I put my gun?”
