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In This Issue
- The Spec Almost Led Me Into White Slavery
- Where Have All the Strippers Gone?
- Abused by Geriatrics Without Prozac
- Letters to the Editor(s)
- Marauding Interviewer
- Free to Speak? Shut Up!
- Where It's Safe to Sodomize
- Unionized Columbians Become Denizens of Primal Gangland
- CAVA Shifts Focus from Medicine to Profitability
- Garment Grabber Liberates Clothes From Floor
- Legless Pigeon Recounts Tales of Early Abuse
- Geek has +9 Indifference Cloak Against Discrimination
- Columbia Hits Me Where the Bruises Will Never Show
- We Have a Film Critic?
- The Future Is Now, and It's Pointing and Laughing
- Juice Review - A Mango Juice Odyssey
- Fed Favorites
- I Hate You Damn Happy People
- Your Pets Will Be Waiting for You in Hell
- Fruitloop and Dandy
- Wacky Fun Abuse!
- My AIM is True
- A Word from Our Advertisers
- THEY Watch
- The Staff of 17.7
Marauding Interviewer
Ethan Heitner, photos by Jeremy Biddle
When we here at the Fed think about abuse, the first thing that comes to mind is Michel Foucault, dressed in a constrictive leather jockstrap, whipping us and shouting post-structural theory. But the next thing we think of is definitely Barnard girls.
Melissa, BC ‘04
Will you hit me?
What? No!
Can I hit you?
What?
Do you know anything about BDSM?
I'm sorry?
You know, bondage and discipline, dominance and submission, sadomasochism-- leather and stuff.
Unfortunately, no.
Unfortunately?
Thankfully, I mean. Thankfully no.
Emily, BC ‘05
What do you know about BDSM?
Oh, all about it.
What? All about it? What are you into?
Um....
How did you get into it?
I took a class.
You took a class? Where?
We had it in school. It was in Sex Ed.
Holy shit! Where did you go to school?
Massachusetts.
Will you hit me?
Um, I don't feel comfortable doing this unless we're alone.
[To camera man] Turn around.
Um, maybe if I knew you better.
Hi, my name's Ethan. Come on, just hit me! Stop stalling!
No, no, I really can't.
Elise, BC ‘05
Will you hit me?
Am I a hippie?
No, no, will you hit me?
Um, yeah, sure, I guess I would. What, like right now?
Yes, please.
Well, maybe if you did something, or something. But I'm not just going to walk up to you and hit you.
Please? Even if I was really annoying? Please please please?
I really don't want to.
What if I hit you first? Then would you hit me?
Yeah, I'd deck you.
Rachel, BC '02
Will you hit me?
Sure. Where, like in the mouth or in the stomach, or what?
Um, in the stomach, I guess.
I don't hit so hard.
That's okay. Just take a shot.
[ your trusty Fed reporter receiving a smackin']
Would it turn you on to be hit? Can I hit you?
No, I was doing you a favor. I hope you were excited when I hit you.
Well, yeah, just a tad, yeah.