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In This Issue

• Editorial Staff, Cartoonist Apologize for Comic
• Spec Buggers Queer Coverage
• Contraceptive Addiction: The Next Big Thing
• Letters to the Feditrix
• BOSS Leader on Racism
• Fed Editor on Racism
• Howard Dean Broke my Heart
• More on Columbia Security Department
• Lasers Make Atlanta Almost Cool
• Barnard Student Government Shows Resolution
• Jesus: Zombie Demigod Beloved By All
• Fundamentally Funny Bible Games
• Fed Fun Guide to Columbia Campus

To Whom it May Concern:

I am an African-American junior at the University of Pennsylvania as well as Executive Editor of the Vision Magazine, a student run campus-wide publication at Penn. Recently, I was shocked, appalled, and truly hurt by the Blacky Fun Whitey comic strip that your publication decided to run. I was shocked because as journalists we must uphold certain ethical and professional values. It is our responsibility to be conscious of what we present before the public. True, enough, you may be an alternative publication; however, unless you are the KKK Chronicle, The Fed has to have certain limits- not censorship but common sense.

I was hurt by your apology. It was very "politically correct", possibly even sincere. However, besides updating your editorial policy and printing an apology, what else are you going to do? What are you going to do to be a solution instead of part of the problem?

The problem with the comic strip is not just racism. Racism stems from ignorance. Step outside of your box as editor, writer, editorial cartoonist and try to fill the shoes of the black student who on the way to class walks by an Affirmative Action bake sale and then finally gets to the class where he/she is the only student of color. They sit down with the latest issue of The Fed and get slapped in the face with that cartoon. Now, think about all of the other white students in the class also reading the Fed, some who have never really interacted with those outside of their race, who turn and look at this student of color. Think about how that comic strip reinforces racist stereotypes.

As a journalist, fellow collegiate, and an African-American woman; I just expect more than ignorance. From looking at the rest of your issues, you have a good publication. You should expect more as well.

Sincerely,
Ashley Foxx

To the Editors:

Over the weekend, my daughter expressed concern over what she and other African American students at Columbia U felt were racist comments that appeared in your newsletter. According to my daughter this has been going on for several months. As a result, the African American students are wearing all black and staging a silent protest today. I read on-line the purpose of your newsletter, and it doesn't appear that the intent of the newsletter is to offend African American students, or any minority group. Can you please tell me how you would address their concerns, or if you would at all. Are they overreacting? What would you suggest could be done to foster positive dialogue? My daughter loves Columbia University and I certainly want her experience to be positive.

A Concerned Parent

YOU CAN KEEP YOUR APOLOGY!!! You achieved exactly what you wanted to do, bring attention to your paper at the expense of a race of people that you genuinely have zero respect for. You intended to tickle the funny bones of other closet racist on campus with this cartoon but what you have accomplished is far beyond your comprehension and if you think that those offended will be pacified by an apology then your even more arrogant than I thought. It is amazing that a group of so called intelligent minds would not only conspire but actually carry out such a disgusting display of blatant disregard and then have the nerve to issue a half hearted apology after the damage was done.

I know that the people responsible for this cartoon are nothing more than racists, and my thinking is, what better way to convey your true feelings than hiding it behind the veil of journalistic freedom. Your nerve truly baffles me. People like you not only perpetuate racism but you benefit from it as well, but what is more disturbing is that this is probably not something that was just picked up one day, no, this type of thinking was instilled in you by those within your social circle and this will not be the last time that your backward ass views offend a race of people. This wasn't a mistake, this was a calculated assault on people of African decent everywhere so on the behalf of all of my people, GO AND FUCK YOURSELF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi,

I want to say that I don't give a crap about your stupid comic. It was a ridiculously idiotic idea, but I am sure you have realized that by now. What I do want to write to you about is how you have begun to create an environment in which I feel out of place, an environment in which I feel threatened.

I do care when you affect my life and my personal space at college. And your putting up a whole bunch of flyers and responding to this email with your standard "We are so sorry!" email is not going to fix anything.

What I really do hope to see is someone on your newspaper take a stand and take some real responsibility for your behavior and for the changes in the environment.

Thanks, Ambalika Pinto

(Yes, I am brown, and no, believe it or not, I don't hate white people)

As a senior and long time subscriber to the Fed, I must say that this entire affair has been blown drastically out of proportions. I am not arguing that the Fed's comic section is politically incorrect, rather, I am just pointing out the fact that politically incorrect satire is the mainstay of all Fed publications. Blaming the Fed for insensitivity is akin to blaming the Onion of misreporting news, or condemning the Drudge Report for bouts of geopolitical paranoia. As an avid reader of the Fed, I have personally laughed at previous issues where Asians, Whites, Jews, feminists, immigrants, corporate yes-men, Japanese Bukake porn stars, socialists, engineers, hobbits, and unicorns were systematically and humorously denigrated. Why is it that all of these people and mythical creatures can be mocked without retribution, while a caricature of African American stereotypes is met with such scorn? The point of my argument is that since low-class and subversive humor is the purpose of the Fed, we certainly should not condemn these people for doing their jobs with skill and finesse. Furthermore, it seems to me that the vast majority of the people protesting on the steps today have never read the Fed. This paper was never meant to be taken seriously. I'm sure that if they had previously read the Fed, then no ire would've been raised in the first place.

--"What I told President Bollinger" from Ke Xu

Dear Editors, I am writing to you because like most in the country, I saw the media coverage of your latest racist issue. What surprised me was the fact that people in college with so much information at your fingertips could be so stupid! Black people were not invented, we were created by God..and not for cheap labor. Another fact easily verified, black people wound up in this country because lazy, jealous,cowardly european wretches invaded Africa, raiding tombs of kings/pharoahs stealing gold and precious stones. Here's something that'll really bother you, in every single bible in print( no matter what new version)..Jesus is described as having "skin of bronze, and hair like lambs' wool". Go grab a penny,....now take a look at it, .....go find a black person,...look at him/her.....then look at yourself, then look at the penny again,.... which of you looks like that penny?You are far better drug smugglers, and liars/shapers/re-writers of his-story than us!! The c.i.a. admitting bringing drugs into this country(obviously to debauch blacks..it worked and back fired, because whites are hooked too) hit the books before you open your mouth and remove all doubt!!

Verne Green


Please note that we have responded to all of these emails as promptly, courterously, and professionally as possible. We had far too many letters to publish; we wanted to publish a sampling of the letters we got; ranging from the completely reasonable, to the understandably irate, to the simply insane. Essentially, we apologized to each of these people individually, and answered their questions as best we could. You have every right not to accept our apology, but I repeat that it is sincere.

To the Editors of the Fed:

The offensive, highly-publicized cartoon of last issue has received more attention than such a thoughtless piece of poor taste deserves. You have published an article which, as it surpasses any intelligent description, can only be described as similarly tasteless. Mr. Heitner seems to think that the excuse of "I clearly have lots and lots of issues" is sufficient to launch a bitter diatribe about Jews and Jewish culture.

While his historical and cultural knowledge is clearly deep and impressive, perhaps he has forgotten that the Nazis waged a massive genocide against the Jews of Europe which ended only 59 years ago. While he clearly has an incredible grasp of cultural and ethnic issues, perhaps he should review the past century's major historical and political events and rethink his definition of "oppressed."

Yes, Mr. Heitner. We can all see that you have plenty of issues. Attempting to compose a satirical piece on Jewish culture is clearly not where you should be directing your time and energy, however. I would suggest therapy.

I am surprised that the editors of the Fed, my fellow students, would agree to print this piece. In doing so, you have deeply offended many on this campus and have taken the fight to end prejudice and bias more than a step backward.

-Elizabeth Cate
BC '04

If this article is an attempt at satire, then if I were you, as editors I would be ashamed at what passes for satire these days. If it's not satire (and since a poorly written satire does a bad job of announcing itself as such, and is therefore difficult to label as such) then I suggest you never print anything by this idiot again. It wasn't even funny, assuming that it was a satire. And it's no excuse that the author is possibly Jewish because he did such a bad job of being a Jewish satirist as opposed to a Jew-hater.

I do not believe that is acceptable journalism; the New York Times does not publish opinions that are clearly racist - no one has an interest in reading them, they are not ‘news' b/c they are in fact false, and publishing them merely legitimizes them, and clearly reflects poorly upon whoever thinks such ideas merit any legitimization.

Ariel Meyerstein CC ‘02

Dear Ethan,

You should be disgusted with yourself as a Jew and as a human being. You are so painfully ignorant I don't know if it even pays to write you this letter. But I hope you have trouble sleeping tonight when you think about the 900 dead Israelis (including some Americans) killed by evil Arab (that's right) terrorists for eating pizza or riding a bus, the scattered flesh and incinerated bodies of children and adults, and even more seriously injured who may never walk or talk again. Not to mention all the millions of Jews that were murdered and maimed by our enemies over the last few thousand years. I hope you are happy knowing that due to people like you they are turning in their graves. You may have whatever opinion about Israel's policies but you commit a grave sin in standing by the blood of your brothers.

The only valid sin that you can legitimately accuse your society of is not giving you a proper Jewish upbringing and teaching you of the beauty and richness of G-d's Torah; such that you can bring this shame to your family and people.

I hope you see the error of your ways and seek out rabbinical counsel who can help you return to G-d and to your people.

Sincerely,

Aimee Cohen

To the Jewish Community:

Thank you for bringing this to our attention. The executive editors of the Fed had a very constructive meeting with two members of Hillel. They were very reasonable, nice, and yes, I'll say it, funny people.

They told us that while some articles the Fed has published about Judiaism are funny, despite offensive aspects, they felt that the article in question was merely trying to use humor as a vehicle for pointless offensiveness, anger, and even hate.

Of course, not everyone feels this way--we've gotten positive feedback from both Jew and goy alike. Another thing to keep in mind is that many of the people giving us negative feedback have read it on the web and not in the paper itself--perhaps seeing the article next to a point-counter point on women having prostates would make one read the article with more understanding that the author was trying to be pretty absurd.

However, there is a line between offensive and hurtful, and if any of our readers felt we crossed it with this article, then we are genuinely sorry.

We distribute to a campus with a large Jewish population and few Anti-Semitic incidences (though they are by no means non-existant). On campus, we have little worry that this article could "get into the wrong hands" and encourage an anti-Semite because some Jewish author doesn't like Jews too. However, we recognize that having the article posted on our website is a different story; anyone can get their hands on it, and take it out of context. So, to prevent the article from causing further damage or hurt, we've removed it from our webpage.
In addition, we are reviewing our editorial process; while the Fed is still a forum and will not reject articles because we the editors don't agree with them, the Fed should never be considered a forum for hate. I mean, really, what's the point in that?

On that note, someone recently demanded that we apologize for everything offensive we have ever printed. Don't count on it. While our intention isn't just to offend, it is a technique used by humorists, comedians, and satirists the world over to instigate discussion. And offence is a very subjective thing; some might be offended that I've used the word "cooch" before, and others are offended that another writer doesn't believe in Jesus. But we as editors should have a general idea of where that line is between offence and hurt or hate and we pledge to be more sensitive to that in the future.

Sincerely,

Kate, Feditor-in-Chief

I hope the recent uproar over Ben Schwartz's comic strip brings an end to your annoying paper. It is a worthless rag that is neither funny, well written or informative and I hope it never clogs my mailbox again.

The Fed is nothing more than a bunch of kids pretending to be grown up by printing silly sex jokes. The cover illustration of two flowers in the shape of genitals -- ha-ha. So deliberately unsubtle. The article titled "An Application for Spec Sex Columnist" was poorly conceived and hardly as funny as the author wanted it to be.

Just to jab at two things in your recent (and hopefully last) issue.

And who edits this thing? I hope to god it isn't anyone who is trying to pursue a degree in English. Perhaps if the editors actually edited and proofed this mag... Just because you'll print anything a pent-up student throws at you does not mean you can't run it through spell check.

I could go on, but I've made my point.

--A. Cho

Dear Mr. Cho,

I am so deeply sorry that you find our paper below your standards. We really do try to please every arrogant, elitist, erudite jerkwad whiner on this fine academic campus.

Because we will still be publishing for a long time to come, we will do everything in our power to adjust the content of The Fed to fit your needs. In the meantime, feel free to recycle us. Save the environment!

Also, before you get condescending about other people's spell checking, I would recommend checking your own emails for grammatical errors. For future reference, its proper to say "neither... nor" NOT "neither... or".

Yours truly and affectionately,

Kate Sullivan
Editor-in-Chief.

PS: You're ugly