First Meeting of Fall 2008!
Sunday, September 7th at 9 PM
Lerner 5th Floor- Broadway side (near the elevators)
All are welcome.
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In This Issue
- A Sneak Peek at Barnard’s New Vag
- Teacher's Pet Joins Elite Rank of CC Assignments
- Take a Ride on a Fiction Plane with Rachel Katz
- The Letters to the Feditor Strike Back
- What What (In The Butt): A Debate For The Ages
- Celebrity Beer Pong New To Network TV
- The Room-mate Chronicles
- C.J. Parker vs. Wolverine: Dispatches from the White House Correspondents Dinner 2008
- Columbia and the Perception of Self: A List of Stuff
- If I Were Graduating, I Would Be Thanking the Following People Whom I've Never Met
- Graduate Reflects: “Da faaaackkk???”
- A Message from the Next Chief Judge of the D.C. Circuit
- Don’t Forget to Bring a Towel, Experts Warn
- Therapist’s ADD Cured By Hourly Wage
- A Red Letter Day For the Green-Thumbed
- A Public Service Announcement from the Ad Council
- THEY Watch
- The Staff of 23.7
If I Were Graduating, I Would Be Thanking the Following People Whom I've Never Met
Arnold Park
King George II: For putting the Kings Crown in Kings Crown Shakespeare Troupe.
James Polshek: For showing that Architecture School deans can indeed create well-designed, functional buildings.
The Prostitutes of the Arizona Hotel: For embarrassing the Trustees back in the 1960's into buying the hotel and converting it into Ruggles Hall. (Thus continuing Columbia's proud tradition of cockblocking.)
David Paul: For directing the 110th Annual Varsity Show, which left an indelible impression on a then-pre-frosh.
Frederick A. P. Barnard: Because Barnard women are wonderful mystical creatures.
Thomas Buczkowski: For leaving behind stories fondly remembered by the old Lerner Techs.
Ben Schwartz: For profoundly shaping the course of human events.
Ed Koch and the New York City Council Circa 1980: For keeping us safe from falling masonry, and making sure Columbia will never kill its students or the students of its affiliates ever again.
Gene Richeson, Ken Oshman, Walter Loewenstern, and Robert Maxfield: For founding the ROLM Corporation, inventors of the greatest phone system ever made.
Sister Mary Nonna Dunphy: For founding a school that nurtured the most amazing person I've ever met.
The Committee That Drafted the Leave of Absence Procedures: For sparing my sanity - and phone calls from the Alumni Association for about two more years.
[Fortunately for the Fed, Arnold will be with us again next fall after taking a year off from school, but he is awesome enough to merit two graduation pieces. We do not miss you yet, Arnold, but we will eventually! -Ed.]