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Church Purchases Kwanzaa
Issue 25.3: December 2009
Posted: December 15, 2009

These Are A Few of Our Favorite Things

As a self-gratifying tribute to all the Top 10 lists published by the Fed over the last twenty-four years, we have chosen to print an entire spread of top lists of varied lengths:

Top 5 ways to take back the night
1. Pawn E4 to F5
2. With a receipt
3. By force
4. Flashlight
5. Your mother

Top 2 Columbia Footballs wins in '09 season (only have 2)
1. Princeton
2. Fordam

Top 4 noises
1. Blump
2. Getting the two sinks in the top floor of butler to harmonize
3. The swish of silk on cotton
4. Clicking of the Lerner turnstiles

Top 10 Top Ten Lists
1. Top 10 different bases
2. Top 10 ways to cook a baby
3. Top 10 STIs I contracted this year
4. Top 10 ways to fuck a turkey
5. Top 10 things that are awesome

Top 10 most awkward things to walk in on your roommate doing
1. Your mom
2. Singing
3. Picking his nose
4. Installing passwords on your mac
5. Self prostate exam
6. Sexting your girlfriend as you
7. Urinating on your cheerios
8. Masturbating
9. Masturbating to Barney
10. Masturbating Barney

Top 10 Months
1. April
2. Just Kidding

Top 9 Columbia Publications
1. Spectator
2. The Eye
3. Jester
4. The Fed
5. Inside New York
6. JTS Magazine
7. Columbia University Law Review
8. Blue and White
9.Philosophy Journal

Top 4 Rocky Movies
1. Rocky and Bullwinkle
2. The Rock
3. The Rocky Horror Picture Show
4. Rocky 3

Top 11 Seasons
1. Winter
2. Spring
3. Summer
4. Football season
5. Seasons of love
6. Hunting
7. Killing
8. Holiday
9. Fall
10. Rainy
11. Pepper